Snickerdoodle Protocol

“	Pick any Eridanus ship, scan your signet with the captain, and get yourself to any corner of the sector you want, without anyone but the people on that ship knowing.	”
	— Vaultkeeper Eridanus Eridanus Avon II, speaking to Emperox Pyxis Solanum Rona after the Coronation of the Eternal Rose

Description

The Snickerdoodle Protocol is relatively simple, yet in true House Eridanus fashion, has been wrapped in addendums, clarifications of fringe scenarios, and looping references. The simple version, as presented within a small scroll case upon the swearing of fealty to the Emperox, is as follows:

1. Any Eridanus ship that is boarded by the Emperox is temporarily redesignated to the HES Snickerdoodle.
2. The Emperox maintains full operational control of the HES Snickerdoodle.
3. No documentation is kept on the HES Snickerdoodle, with the exception of the universal gag order on everything relating to the HES Snickerdoodle
4. This allows confidential transportation of the Emperox and her retinue to anywhere in the sector under the guise of normal Eridanii trade and transportation.

An Eridanii Captain’s Perspective

Because nothing is written about the operations of the Snickerdoodle Protocol, very few Eridanii ship captains know of its existence, much less full details. Thus, encrypted instructions have been placed into the rulebook for each and every Eridanii ship. Like many portions of the captain’s rulebook, the protocol’s instructions only unencrypt under specific circumstances. In the protocol’s case, only when the Emperox or her Eridanii attache sends word, or boards the ship.

The abridged version of the captain’s instructions include:

1. Scan the SIGNET of the Emperox to ensure validity.
2. Receive any and all instructions from the Emperox.
3. Give an all hands briefing to the crew, relaying the Emperox’s instructions, and emphasizing information security, under penalty of blacklisting.
4. Ensure adequate provisioning for adjusted passengers and route.
5. Get underway!

Reaction Within Eridanus

There were some within the small group of Eridanii privy to fealty gift discussions that voiced discontent with the idea of the protocol. Primarily originating from the conservative voices of the house, the arguments against included:

• The Protocol would be too expensive, or at the very least unprofitable.
• An Eridanii fealty gift should push the house’s agenda in some way.
• It is the house’s duty to track and archive any vessel’s cargo and route.

The counter to these arguments was inherent to the Protocol: the gift purposefully contending with the house’s nature of plutocracy and hypergraphia made it perfect for the Emperox of House Pyxis.

Further concern came with the idea of false prosecution. Given the clandestine nature of the protocol, it was likely that a captain would be reprimanded for following orders from higher up, without the ability to give a reason for their actions. Thus, the beginnings of the Office of Unforeseen Consequences, uhh, began.

Office of Unforeseen Consequences

“	The ledger cannot lie, but it loves to obfuscate.	”
	—

The Office of Unforeseen Consequences, shortened to The Bakery, is unique within House Eridanus; an office with the exclusive purpose of tracking the Emperox in order to prevent false prosecution of Eridanii personnel.

In keeping with the spirit of the fealty gift, the Office of Unforeseen Consequences is expected to take all possible precautions to avoid compromising the purpose or details of the Emperox’s clandestine travels, including to the staff of the office itself. Composed of a specially-appointed Scrutineer and Savii, along with several Quants and Texarchs, the office is meant to operate primarily by scrutinising hard data transmitted back to its home office within Tyr upon Tiber. Except in rare cases, where additional certainty is both required and warranted, the office shies away from direct interviews or accounts from ship’s crew, relying almost exclusively on public broadcasts, transaction histories, and ship telemetry. When an office agent is dispatched to deliver a verdict, their decision is to be adhered to without question.

The Bakery shares the Protocol’s secrecy. A vast majority of the house does not know of its existence, especially outside of the upper echelon. Even fewer know the power that it can exert to force certain situations to abruptly end. When appearing in a Cruxian court, the Scrutineer and Savii of the office speak with the weight of the House. When negotiating between two Eridanii parties, such as refusal to pay, termination of employment, or other minor reprimands, any noble member of the office speaks for the House.

This power is expected to be used for personal gain. Even though full knowledge of the Office of Unforeseen Consequences’s reach is extremely limited, the 90% tax rate on Eridanii bribery is expected to pay for several stalled public works on Tiber.

Naturally, the Bakery is not perfect, and once every blue moon a very fortunate ship captain finds themselves suddenly and inexplicably exonerated for a crime they very much committed.